cobwebs for maps

deletriused:

freakypencils:

deletriused:

she wears short skirts

i wear tshirts

she’s cheer captain and

i blog all night until my eyes are red and scream when people talk to me first and reach post limit and sit there for 3 hours waiting for it to let up and talk to my cat and tell him he’s a sweetie pie and dress up like a wizard

so call me maybe

wrong song bro

(Source: mrshermione, via shmaduhline)

where the fuck did my best friends go?

i always say i have a best friend, but i’m never anyone’s best friend.

i don’t have one now, though.

i wish i had a relationship like everyone else seems to have: where we’ve been best friends since we were young. i’ve never had that. i can never keep friends. i have never, ever kept a friend longer than 4 years (with the exception of my friend ryan). idk what’s wrong with me. no, i do know: i’m mean, i’m opinionated; everyone always seems to hate that about me. people don’t like how confident i am; i’m just conceited. i’m lazy, i’m a mooch. the only person in this world who can stand me, and takes me as i am, through my ups and downs, is david. i’m not exaggerating. i can always be there for people, but no one seems to be found when i need them.

you want to know the one thing that broke my heart? none of my friends showed up when i was getting my head shaved. i told them all three months in advance, even more than that, and they told me they would. only one of my friends came. i cried so hard to david when i got home, the friday before. it hurt so bad to know a life-changing event for me wasn’t that important to my friends.

but no one can ever tell me these things; how they want to move on, or how they don’t like me anymore. how they can’t stand me. as if they’re afraid of me. they just become bitter towards me. so i just leave.

being home brings all this to a reality. i don’t hang out with friends, or have fun and go out with people. i work. and sit at home and read books. i haven’t seen anyone else besides my family, david and my coworkers since i’ve been home. no one asks to do something. or even talk to me to see how i am. it hurts.

the only reason i say this kind of shit on here is because i don’t have anyone to vent to. i don’t like putting the burden on david all the time even though he would gladly take it. i have no one to talk to about my feelings. and it hurts my chest.

i need to sleep. i have a nine hour shift tomorrow.

i’m sorry.